May 2013
8 tags
I just found out that I live in the most conservative county in the country.
niallhortonhearsawho:
a girl walks into a classroom wearing a spaghetti strap shirt. immediately every boy within a 50 yard radius gets a raging erection. the teacher attempts to present a lesson but to no avail, no one can hear over the sound of every male student masturbating to this girl’s shoulders. why couldn’t she just wear a long sleeved shirt
tappingtomlinson:
does somebody want to go move to a random city with me and live in a cute apartment and just go to coffee shops a lot and blog and go on city adventures and forget about everything else and we can worry about money when we get there okay let’s just go who’s up for it
1 tag
Parents: Teenagers don't communicate anymore
Parents : Teenagers don't speak to us any more
Parents: It's all Facebook messaging now
Parents : No one communicates with their children
Parents : It's all about communication
Parents: Teenagers should talk to us more
Teenager: Well, I'm really stressed out about these test and lately i've felt really crap and-
Parents: Gosh, all you do is moan.
1 tag
geekishchic:
cannibalcoalition:
You know what?
I don’t care if being a lesbian isn’t natural.
Its 2013. Oreos don’t have a single natural ingredient in them that isn’t distilled out of recognition. People get their vegetables from cans. They have made cruelty-free, lab-grown BACON. People fly around in big, metal machines.
I. AM. TALKING. TO SOMEONE. ACROSS THE WORLD. IN A MATTER OF...
watchtheskytonight:
diannaluvslea:
sillylittleshoteka:
spontaneousfangasm:
sovietkittens:
if you go to hell for being bad why wouldn’t satan reward you for it why does he make you suffer wtf id be like hell yeah motherfucker you my nigga lets party
i started to laugh and then i realized that this is actually a really valid question
Alternatively, if Satan punishes sinners, why isn’t...
2 tags
fucks-currently-being-given:
rdjmpreg666:
“it’s not rape if she likes it”
false
it’s not rape if you two are willing to have a one night stand/romantic evening and you don’t drug her/make her drunk
its not rape if there is mutual consent
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3 tags
1 tag
lesbiandinnnerparty:
If you’re lesbian and you fall for a guy FINE If you’re gay and you fall for a woman FINE If you’re bisexual and you have a preference for girls FINE If you’re bisexual and you have a preference for guys FINE If you’re pansexual and have a preference FINE What’s not fine is telling someone they can’t love another person because it doesn’t fit into the confinements of a...
1 tag
2 tags
yourbones:
somegirlnamedkaitlyn:
My dog understands the word “No,” so how are you going to tell me teenage boys don’t know the difference between rape and consent?
Nailed it.
1 tag
1 tag
doctorheavenharkness:
n0kil7ing:
sevenseasaurus:
Science experiment: Who is easiest to summon?
Egberts?
Pizza?
John Green?
A vegan?
The only way to find out is to reblog and wait. Wait patiently. Just wait. It will be good I promise.
fuck you vegans aren’t your source of entertainment you animal killers.
and the vegan wins
jesspinkman:
being a pessimist is great i’m always either right or pleasantly surprised
#the optimistic look on pessimism
5 tags
Don’t worry about your body.
It isn’t as small as it once was,
But honestly,...
– For My Mother When She Doesn’t Feel Beautiful (via clementinevonradics)
This was needed. Ugh, I’m such a cry baby. (via dancing-with-diversity)
Books were only one type of receptacle where we stored a lot of things we were...
– Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451 (via thebooker)
foxnewsofficial:
scuba-steve-damn-you:
foxnewsofficial:
SEND EVERYONE YOU KNOW A MORNING TEXT. WEAR A BOWTIE TODAY. HIGH FIVE STRANGERS. GIVE AWAY LOLLIPOPS. COMPLIMENT PEOPLE. STEAL A CHILD.
i’ve already done one of those and now he won’t stop crying and it’s annoying
must have been an aggressive high five
2 tags
OMG Facts *official tumblr*: Your brain actually... →
omgfactsofficial:
Your brain actually lives in the past!
The brain is actually living in the past of things that have already happened, because it takes a few milliseconds for the brain to comprehend what is happening around it. So, everything that you think is happening instantly, actually happened a really really short time ago.
To test this, a research study once had people turn on a...
letslikemakememories:
watchtheskytonight:
satan-official:
thearchangeltrickster:
bandannarama:
iamtonysexual:
biptch:
don’t make me snap my fingers in a z formation
hip rotation
booty sensation
ETERNAL DAMNATION
*snaps fingers in a pentagram formation*
*says a Latin incantation*
waits for lucifer with anticipation
your waiting is over my friends
ALL HAIL THE LORD...